How to Navigate Post-Pickup: What to Do After You Get Her Number

How to Navigate Post-Pickup: What to Do After You Get Her Number

So, you’ve finally gathered the courage to approach the woman of your dreams and got her number. Congratulations! But what now? What do you do next? What’s the best way to navigate post-pickup?

As a love and relationships psychology guru, I’ve seen countless men struggle with what to do after getting a woman’s number. The truth is, it’s not just about getting her number, it’s about what you do with it that really counts.

In this article, I’ll share some valuable insights and personal experiences on how to navigate post-pickup successfully. From the first text message to setting up the first date, I’ll cover everything you need to know to keep the attraction alive and turn that phone number into a meaningful relationship.

What You’ll Learn

  • The importance of timing
  • How to craft the perfect first text message
  • When and how to call her
  • Setting up the first date
  • Tips for keeping the attraction alive

Getting her number is just the first step. With the right mindset and approach, you can turn that phone number into a lasting connection. Let’s get started!

Step 1: Take a Deep Breath

Getting her phone number is a big step, but it’s only the beginning of the journey. The next few moments are crucial, and how you handle them can make or break your chances of getting a second date. That’s why it’s important to take a deep breath and stay calm.

Why Taking a Deep Breath is Important

When you get her number, it’s natural to feel excited and nervous at the same time. Your heart rate may increase, and you may start to sweat. These physical reactions are the result of your body’s fight-or-flight response kicking in.

While this response is helpful in dangerous situations, it’s not so useful when you’re trying to make a good impression on someone you’re interested in. That’s where taking a deep breath comes in.

Deep breathing is a simple but effective way to calm your nerves and reduce stress. When you take a deep breath, you activate your parasympathetic nervous system, which helps your body relax.

How to Take a Deep Breath

Here’s a simple technique you can use to take a deep breath:

  1. Sit or stand up straight, with your shoulders relaxed.
  2. Place one hand on your chest and the other on your belly.
  3. Inhale slowly through your nose, counting to four as you do so.
  4. Feel your belly expand as you inhale.
  5. Hold your breath for a few seconds.
  6. Exhale slowly through your mouth, counting to six as you do so.
  7. Feel your belly contract as you exhale.

Repeat this process a few times until you feel calmer and more relaxed. Remember, taking a deep breath is a simple but powerful tool that can help you stay calm and focused in any situation.

Step 2: Send a Text

So, you finally got her number! Congratulations! Now, the question is, how long should you wait before texting her? The answer to this question is simple: don’t wait too long.

Typically, it’s best to send a text within 24 hours of getting her number. This shows that you’re interested and that you’re not going to play games. Waiting too long can make her think that you’re not really interested, or that you’re not serious about pursuing a relationship.

What to Say in Your First Text

The first text you send is important. It sets the tone for your entire interaction and can make or break your chances of getting a date with her. Here are some tips on what to say:

  • Keep it simple and straightforward. Don’t try to be too clever or witty.
  • Reference something you talked about when you met her. This shows that you were paying attention and that you’re interested in getting to know her better.
  • Ask her out on a specific date and time. This shows that you’re serious about seeing her again and that you’re not just looking for a casual hookup.

Here’s an example of a good first text:

You: Hey, it’s [Your Name]. I had a great time talking to you last night at [wherever you met]. Would you like to grab dinner with me at [restaurant] on [specific date and time]?

Remember, the key to a successful first text is to be confident, direct, and respectful. Good luck!

Step 3: Plan the First Date

So, you’ve got her number and now it’s time to plan the first date. This is a crucial step in moving the relationship forward, so it’s important to get it right. Here are some tips to help you plan the perfect first date:

Choosing the Right Time and Place

The first thing you need to do is choose the right time and place for your first date. Make sure you pick a time that works for both of you and a place that you both feel comfortable in. It’s important to choose a location that is conducive to conversation, so avoid noisy bars or crowded restaurants. Instead, opt for a quiet coffee shop or a scenic park where you can take a leisurely walk and get to know each other.

Keep in mind that the location you choose will set the tone for the date, so make sure it’s appropriate for the kind of experience you want to have. If you want to have a romantic evening, choose a candlelit restaurant with a view. If you’re looking for something more casual, consider a local pub or a picnic in the park.

What to Do on the First Date

Once you’ve chosen the time and place, it’s time to decide what to do on your first date. The key is to choose an activity that allows you to get to know each other better. Here are some ideas:

  • Go for a walk in the park
  • Visit a museum or art gallery
  • Take a cooking class together
  • Go to a concert or live performance
  • Try a new restaurant or cuisine

Remember, the goal of the first date is to establish a connection with your potential partner and see if there’s chemistry between you. Keep the conversation light and engaging, and be sure to listen as much as you talk. If all goes well, you can plan a second date and continue to build your relationship from there.

Do: Don’t:
Be yourself Talk about your ex
Be polite and respectful Be late
Ask open-ended questions Talk about controversial topics
Pay attention to your date Check your phone constantly

By following these tips, you can plan the perfect first date and set the stage for a successful relationship. Good luck!

Step 4: Follow Up

So, you’ve successfully gotten her number and are now wondering what to do next. The next step is to follow up with her, but when and how should you do it?

When to Follow Up

Timing is everything when it comes to following up after getting her number. You don’t want to wait too long and risk her losing interest, but you also don’t want to come across as too eager or desperate by reaching out immediately.

A good rule of thumb is to wait a day or two before sending a text or making a call. This gives her enough time to remember who you are and think about the interaction you had, but it’s not so long that she’ll forget about you entirely.

What to Say When Following Up

When it comes to what to say when following up, keep it simple and casual. You don’t need to come up with anything overly clever or elaborate.

A good approach is to reference something from your initial conversation to jog her memory and show that you were paying attention. For example, if you talked about a favorite restaurant, you could say something like:

  • “Hey, it’s [your name]. I just wanted to say thanks for the recommendation on [restaurant name]. I’m definitely planning to check it out soon!”

Another option is to suggest a specific activity or plan for your next interaction. This shows that you’re interested in seeing her again and have put some thought into what you could do together. For example:

  • “Hey, it’s [your name]. I was thinking it would be fun to grab a drink or catch a movie sometime this week. Are you free on [specific day]?”
Do: Don’t:
Keep it simple and casual Be overly eager or desperate
Reference something from your initial conversation Send a generic or impersonal message
Suggest a specific activity or plan for your next interaction Leave things open-ended or vague

Remember, the key to successfully following up after getting her number is to be genuine, confident, and respectful of her time and interest. With these tips in mind, you’ll be well on your way to navigating post-pickup like a pro.


Getting a girl’s number is just the beginning of your journey towards building a relationship. What you do after getting her number matters a lot. Remember, women are attracted to men who are confident, respectful, and genuine. Therefore, it is essential to maintain a positive attitude and be yourself throughout the process.

Start by sending her a text message to let her know you enjoyed meeting her and that you would like to see her again. Avoid being too pushy or aggressive when asking her out on a date. Instead, be considerate of her schedule and make plans that suit both of you.

During the date, be attentive, and listen to what she has to say. Show genuine interest in her life, hobbies, and passions. Avoid talking about yourself too much or being overly aggressive. Remember, building a connection takes time and effort.

Finally, remember to be patient and keep things in perspective. Not every girl you meet will be interested in pursuing a relationship with you, and that’s okay. Keep an open mind, and don’t be afraid to put yourself out there. With time and practice, you’ll become more confident and comfortable navigating post-pickup scenarios.

  • Be confident and respectful throughout the process
  • Send a text message to let her know you enjoyed meeting her
  • Avoid being too pushy or aggressive when asking her out
  • Show genuine interest in her life, hobbies, and passions
  • Be patient and keep things in perspective

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